‘Called Out’ (NBAE/Getty Images)

This is a call out! To all the residents, fans, and players of the city of Houston, or more specifically, the Houston Rockets… by which you so sadly stand.

In a state where everything is bigger, I guess with Yao as your star, the irony is deeper. He seems like a kind man; soft spoken and mellow… Too bad those traits carry over to the court, “Come on people, what’s with the hype?” Yao moves with the rapidity of Jell-O!

And what more can be said of Tracy “The Big Sleep” McGrady, when his nickname alone says it all… his contract seems shady. As in: not as expected. Are you trying to sell jerseys or just get disrespected? Last years sad post-season effort was put on your shoulders. Was McGrady clutch? Not so much. Just ask the season ticket holders.

However, all-in-all, you South Texas boys aren’t all that bad. “Skip-to-my-Lou” Alston was my mix-tape hero… before I realized those playground moves are all he had.

But let me digress, on a more welcoming note, we are excited to have you here on November the first. In fact, come around more often, we enjoy holding clinics for amateur teams who haven’t rehearsed.