Happy belated birthday to our resident Beast, Carlos Austin Boozer, Jr. He turned 26 on November 20th. I racked my small brain for gift ideas, but what do you get a guy that makes $11,593,816 per year? The answer was easy: a haiku. Nothing says “Happy Birthday” like a haiku. Thus, with all apologies to Jazzbots lyricist Joshua Leavitt, the following five haikus are my birthday present to Mr. Boozer.

Jazz Power Forward
Cavs should’ve written it down
Sorry Mr. Gund

Grizzly bear tattoo
Not a soft bear like Jazz Bear
A mean bear, like Booz

All-star performances
Loud screaming and high-arc shots
I have a man crush

Real estate mogul
Never lease to nameless man
Let Jazz purple rain

Alcoholic name
Opponents look like drunk fools
Birthday wishes Booz

Posted by Stanton Huntington on 11,21,2007
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2 Comments to “My Birthday Gift to Carlos Boozer”

RRR on November 21st, 2007 said...

Happy bleated birthday Booz!

the haikus were all pretty good as well.

Linda McFarland on November 22nd, 2007 said...

Should have had the crowd sing happy birthday on Monday. Think he might have liked that.

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