‘hAIR Wallace’ (Gary Dineen - NBAE/Getty Images)

We’ve reached that special time of year again. That time of year where people get to vote for their favorites. The time of year where we watch the glitz and glamour of the rich and famous sporting their best wares, looks and demeanors.

The Oscars, the People’s Choice Awards, The Golden Globes, The Grammy’s and oh yeah, I almost forgot, the NBA All-Star Weekend are all clustered around the beginning of each new year. I’ll have to admit, I’m a sucker for awards shows, but that doesn’t usually translate to me carving out any of my time to watch the All-Star game. In previous posts I’ve talked about the relevance of All-Star Weekend, and one of my fellow Jazzbots wrote a post talking about the crazy way that the voting is set up. I used a similar method (convoluted and incomprehensible) to pick the entrants to the greatest and much more interesting NBA contest of all time: The NBA All-Star Hair Style awards.

You the readers may comment (vote) on your favorite hair looks from the pool of contestants who were chosen based on a very selective and deeply thought-out process, which is really too difficult for me to describe. If you would like to add your write-in candidates please do so in the comment section.

The contestants (in no particular order) are:

The nominees for Best Hair All-Star team:

• Andrei Kirilenko-from spike to hawk, he never ceases to amaze
• Ben Wallace-the Afro-days
• Mikki Moore-his braids are finally long enough to be removed from the next category
• Carlos Boozer-he knows what not to wear
• Dirk Nowitzki-MVP of this league too!
• Ronny Turiaf-he knows how to wear the hair–Braids can be good but they can also be bad (see the next category)
• Fabricio Oberto-his name falls off the tongue much like his beautiful flowing locks
• Kyle Korver-that 70’s style still works –for him and his throngs of female fans (me included)
• Last but not least–Baron Davis-that’s right–this man knows where-to-wear-the-hair. He’s so smooth, you hear Barry White songs in the background whenever he plays.

Now, the All-Star nominees for worst hair are:

• Anderson Varejo-the Sideshow Bob reference is frequently used, but unavoidable-perhaps an elastic hair tie is in order?
• Allen Iverson-I’ll bet he pays a lot for those designs, and while they’re well crafted–they’re also too much
• Carmelo Anthony-AI’s teammate just doesn’t pull off the look in the same way Ronny Turiaf does. I don’t know why, he just doesn’t
• Sasha Vujacic-He looks like a teary-eyed young girl with the long tresses. With short hair he’s a cutie

The next category is for flip-flop All-Stars. Not foot apparel, no, it’s for guys that could fit into either of the previous categories on any given day. The nominees are:

• Steve Nash-One day you’re hot, the next you are most discernibly not. (Hair length isn’t always the determining factor)
• Pao Gasol-European long hair-good, sweaty-crazed-vengeful-mad-man hair-bad
• Mehmet Okur-sometimes he’s endearing with that just tousled look-what a good kid, sometimes he looks like he just got out of bed after 4 days of sleeping one off

Special award for someone who’s hair is so awful, they just don’t fit anywhere else: The Scott Pollard Memorial Award (memorial because it’s truly one of the only things we remember about Scott). This year’s winner:

• Scott Pollard-the medieval scary magician, creepy side-burned-Mohawk days will forever be emblazoned on our retinas

This year’s NBA All-Star Hair League Most Improved Award goes to:

• Chris Kaman!!!!-On behalf of the entire NBA viewers of the world, I would like to thank Chris for severing the ties with the drowned rodent that was grasping on to his head for dear life last year. I don’t think it’s only a coincidence that his game has drastically improved this year, to the point of All-Star candidacy in the other All-Star voting of the NBA