Why Do They Always Have To Change Things?

Posted by The Mueller’s on October 22, 2008

I am trusting the loyal Jazzbots readers to be kind because this post may date me just a bit.

Four score and . . . .just kidding.  But WAY back before I was married, before I had kids, before college . . .way back in high school (you know, those days when you THOUGHT you were SO busy . . .yeah, right) I actually played a game or two of basketball.  I knew quite a bit about it.  Loved to play it, loved to watch it.  And, back in those days there were basketball POSITIONS:  2 guards, 2 forwards and 1 center.  Easy to understand.  Easy to know what your job was.

Well, nowadays, things are very different.  Or maybe I shouldn’t say ‘nowadays’ as Kurt tells me that this is not new.  But, it’s new to me.  It’s not just that they changed the titles of the positions from actual names to numbers (??? help me understand that) but there are also more than 3 roles on the team.  The POWER forward, the small forward, the SHOOTING guard, the OFF guard (wouldn’t want to be him due to the title alone), the Point Guard. . . it’s driving me crazy!    And somehow, just by saying a single number, players know that they are to play, not just forward, but POWER forward.  I thought all forwards  were supposed to be powerful.

‘Left to Right 2,4,3,1,5′ (Andrew D. Bernstein NBAE/Getty Images) 

This reminds be of the time when my oldest came home from grade school to inform me that I can’t help her with her math homework anymore because “we do it differently Mom.  We don’t carry or borrow anymore.  We trade.”   Guess what, it’s the SAME THING!

I guess what has brought all this to light for me is having two girls who are heavily into basketball.  Brooke usually has to play a 5.  She likes to play a 5 but is hoping to play a 4 now that she is in high school.  WHAT????  She talks about this to me as if I should understand and I have to stop her and say:  “Brooke, I have no idea what a 5 is”.

Both of them just look at me like I am speaking Greek if I ask them “are you playing forward tonight?”  FORWARD WHAT?   Nope.  No names anymore, just numbers.  And I guess it shouldn’t matter as long as the girls know what they are doing . . .right?

And yet, I am the one in the stands trying to explain to Grandpas and Grandmas what exactly they are doing.  And yes, I sound like an idiot.  “She is playing a 5.  That’s sort of like a center, but different . . . I think”.

When Kurt is around, he has the lingo and the system down pat.   But somewhere during my years of childbirth and rearing of three little girls, I lost touch with a very important part of the game.  I don’t like feeling old.  I don’t like feeling like I am in the dark.  And I AM learning . . . slowly.  By the time I learn the new lingo, they will undoubtedly change it . . again.

2 Comments

Annie Whittaker on October 22, 2008 said:

Thanks for being so candid, I carefully admit that I still can’t seem to wrap my mind around illegal defense. (Admittedly I’ve never actually looked it up) and they don’t call it as much as they should, so it’s hard to understand just from watching the games.

Andy Larsen on October 22, 2008 said:

Illegal defense now, or then?

Then, you’re right, the rule was pretty complicated and spottily enforced.

A few years ago they changed the rule to allow zone defenses.

Now, it’s just defensive three in the key, just like offense. If a defensive player camps in the paint for more than three seconds, then they should call an automatic technical foul. This is also spottily enforced.

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