7 Unusual Things About the First Game
Posted by Aaron Allen on November 02, 2008
‘Harpring in Bears’ Suit?’ (NBAE/Getty Images)
I’m currently living in New York City and, among other things, studying long form improv comedy. One of the first things we are taught is that improv only works if you are a good observer of what’s happening on stage around you. We are taught to always look for the first unusual thing, the first line or behavior from our scene partner that seems slightly out of place or noteworthy. If you listen and watch closely there is always something that stands out. There are very few absolute maxims in long form improv, but one of the most solid is that if you follow the unusual in a situation its probably going to end up funny.
I’m telling you this because I decided to watch the Jazz’s first game with my improv senses on high alert. I wanted to find the unusual things about the telecast, things that I normally don’t pay attention to because I am so busy concentrating…well…on the game. It helps that I have a DVR, because when you search for unusual things sometimes they are so fleeting that they merit rewinding. It didn’t take me long to find some good ones. As with improv, its up to you (gentle reader) to determine if they are funny, poignant, or just plain stupid.
1. When the Jazz were introduced they had a snappy video montage of certain players with their names or nicknames splashed up on the jumbotron. The nicknames were what I thought was unusual. Why is it that European players never have the standard “first letter of first name and part of last name” nickname, like D-Will or C-Booz? You have to admit it’s a pretty standard nickname formulation for American players. Do the other guys feel like they are missing out? Well, I feel bad for them, so I put together a list of nicknames for the rest of the Jazz that hopefully gives them the street cred of D-Will and C-Booz. Anrdrei is now A-Link. Memo is now M-Kur. Fesenko is now K-Fes, which is by far my favorite because it sounds like he will soon be dating B-Spears. Sloan and Phil Johnson are now J-Slo and P-John (YEAH!, OK!) which is another of my favorites because it souds so legit. Can’t you just see them laying down a hip-hop track? I can.
2. At the end of player introduction and right before the game was supposed to start, the Jazz Bear individually went to each player and gave them a big hug and what looked like whispered words of encouragement. Sloan even said something back to the Bear that looked (through various rewindings) like he was wishing him a “good game”. I half expected the Bear to start the game at the 4 with the way he was prepping with the players before the tip. Are all mascots like this? Is he tight with all the guys? Is it really just Harpring in a Bear suit? Maybe somebody needs to tell that guy he’s not actually on the roster.
3. There is nothing a crowd likes to do more than participate in a mass traveling call. I bet only 10 percent of the crowd ever actually notices the other team almost travel, but if one guy stands up and goes into the twirling arm motion, I guarantee you everyone in his section will suddenly become disco manaics. Next time I go to a game I am going to test my theory and try to sell a traveling call at a random time. 10 bucks says I can get the whole stadium to go along with me within 10 seconds. Any takers?
4. I’m always excited for new seasons because it means I get to see all the new player animations the Telecast uses for its promos. The two most unusual ones Wednesday were D-Will spinning a Jazz logo sign like he was selling Little Ceasers on a street corner, and a clearly disinterested K-Korv throwing a Blackberry at my face. I have to think the players love filming these.
5. Did anyone else find the fake basketball floor of the David James, P-Mann and T-Bail TV set unnerving? It looked so real. Was it there last year? Is the Earth just a giant basketball? Where am I?
6. I don’t know how many viewers caught this but there was a great moment after the K-Mart foul on M-Kur where they cut to a clip of the Jazz bench and one of the assistant coaches (I think it was the Layden) jumped up as if to hold the bench players back from rushing out onto the court. He was doing his job, as any player that leaves the bench to fight gets automatically suspended, but it wasn’t that type of game and obviously nobody was in the mood to brawl. The great part about the clip is that D-Will finds it hilarious and laughs at the coach like you would laugh at that one overzealous boy scout who always takes his merit badges way too seriously. I found this unusual and amusing.
7. Of course, the most unusual thing about the game was that the Jazz won despite turning the ball over 8 billion times. I guess it just goes to show you how rebounding beasts like Boozer and P-Sap really can make up for D-Will’s absence. At least against a Nuggets team that (sadly, because I respect how hard Iverson plays) looked really, really bad.
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Mallory Meyer on November 02, 2008 said:
I’m so bummed I didn’t catch number 6! Absolutely hilarious. Get that up on youtube.